Costume Drama Porn that I MADE.

Don't be jealous everyone, BUT...I made some fan videos concerning Jane Austen. We here at Lucky Ball Charms are very open and RATHER FANATICAL about our love for Ms. Austen and her works, so I don't want to hear any SNICKERING about how lame video tributes are or how you think Jane Austen books are boring. Everyone knows that Jane Austen is amazing. So, dear readers, you'll watch these two fan videos of the biopic Becoming Jane AND the 2007 adaptation of Persuasion. You'll watch them and LIKE them. Or else.





P.S. I know my first video has some ISSUES, but it's the first one I EVER MADE, so you all can give me a break, here.

HELLO, people. It's Huddy.

So, this is probably yet another sign that this show has completely jumped the shark by continuing in its rapid replacement of fascinating medical mystery with juicy character melodrama, BUT I don't really care because I enjoy watching Hugh Laurie make out with people. I guess it doesn't hurt that I am ALL ABOUT some Huddy. Also, I'd like the writers of House to know that I am going to need to see a ton more of this kind of thing in season five. Otherwise, it could get UGLY. I might have to STOP WATCHING. Yeah! That's right. Take THAT. I mean, it's not like your show CONTROLS me. I don't HAVE to watch it, you know. I can stop any time I want...

Oh HEY EVERYONE. Today, we're going to apprise you of more hot people on tv. Well, one more anyway. To watch sex-ay Rufus Sewell as brilliant biophysicist Dr. Jacob Hood (genius is SO HOT, people), you'll have to tune in to CBS on Thursdays at 10 and watch Eleventh Hour.

Sadly, we have to say that the actual show is not so amazing. We feel that there is a glaring lack of chemistry between the two main characters, probably due to the awkward, sex kitten-y way his costar is playing her FBI agent character. Also, the episodes are way too preachy for my taste. Still, who even cares about that when you can watch Rufus Sewell? You could always just put your tv on mute and TAKE IN THE VIEW. Oh yeah.

More Joy of HSN.

Oh, HSN! You never disappoint! Check out Handbags by Sharif. AND, there's video, of course:



To me, these bags look like something that might appear in one of those little girl dress-up trunks you can get now. You know the ones I'm talking about--the ones that come with sequin tube tops, lace gloves, tutus in three colors and plastic kitten-heeled slides. Also, I love how HSN feels that a major selling point of these bags is that they have a lot of HANDMADE ACCENTS. Hello, people! Handmade does not equal beautiful, okay? I mean, lots of ugly things are HANDMADE--just think of those macaroni pictures you used to make for your mom in second grade. Exactly.

Costume Drama Porn

Lucky Ball Charms definitely wishes there were an actual Costume Drama tv channel. And we wish it were called something like The Cravat Channel or StaysTV. Hello, people, cravats are HOT. I'm glad we're clearly not the only ones who think so:

We here at Lucky Ball Charms take great joy in apprising our readers of hot people on tv. We also feel that there is a tragic shortage of sexy, red-headed men on both the small and silver screens. If you feel the same way, be sure and watch drool-worthy Damian Lewis as Detective Charlie Crews in the crime show Life on NBC, Fridays at 10pm. OR you could just watch full episodes whenever you want online (at NBC or Hulu). That too.

The Joy of HSN.

I can't be the only one who thinks The Home Shopping Network is kind of like valium. It's like, as long as people are still selling stuff on tv, then it can't really be Armageddon. My job(s) might be reaching all-time highs of suckitude, the stock market might be all WTF, and Barack Obama might be about to start spreading my wealth for purposes of fairness. And yet, somehow, watching overly made-up women walking around on sound stages in Diamondique-accented club wear and taking calls from lonely old women in Small Town, USA, all ringed in the ambient glow of a television screen makes me feel OKAY.

So, don't get me wrong, here--I wouldn't actually buy anything off HSN. I'm just admitting that it's KIND OF an anchor for me. Just knowing it's there--like a guard dog or a night light--that's the purpose it serves for me. My favorite segment lately is the amazing Wei East Anti-Aging Cosmetics line made from REAL GOLDEN ROOT. I don't actually know what Golden Root is, but apparently it's only available A MILLION FEET ABOVE SEA LEVEL or something like that, so it's really rare and makes your skin look like baby skin.

...You know, I don't even NEED the snarkiness, E. For real. ANYWAY, as I was saying, watch this video and tell me Wei is not the most comforting tv personality since Johnny Carson. That might be a stretch, but I know that when things get tough for me, I'll be saying, "Oh, Wei, tell me a story! Tell me about the Golden Root and the 'ancient royalties' again and let me know that you'll ALWAYS BE THERE with my Golden Root--no matter what happens!"